The First Bell

There is a distinct kind of silence that precedes the first lesson in a public primary school. It is not peace. It is anticipation, an in-breath before the cacophony. I entered that space with a head full of theory, an English degree, and a genuine passion for language learning. What I lacked was pedagogical muscle memory. This is the embodied knowledge that only practice cultivates.

This article is an attempt to make sense of my own lived experience. I draw on reflective practice (Schön, 2017) as both a method and a mindset. My first year of teaching English to young learners was not a smooth narrative arc. It was a mosaic of tensions, triumphs, and turning points. It was a year of becoming. Not just a teacher, but a practitioner of learning.

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Becoming a Teacher: Reality Hits Differently

Nothing quite prepares you for the psychological demands of teaching. Lesson planning is only the surface of pedagogical work. Beneath it lie emotional labour (Hargreaves, 1998), classroom ecology, behaviour regulation, and interpersonal dynamics. This is especially true when working with young learners (Pianta et al., 2008).

In initial teacher education, I was trained to align activities with communicative competence, scaffold tasks, and differentiate instruction. In reality, I often found myself balancing cognitive load theory (Sweller, 1988) with the basic logistics of getting twenty-five children to sit down and listen.

The emotional intensity of the school day was a learning curve in itself. The concept of “withitness” (Kounin, 1977), which is the teacher’s ability to be mentally present in all corners of the classroom, became more than theory. It became survival. I began to see that successful teaching hinged not only on language input and output. It also depended on relational attunement, regulatory co-construction, and adaptability in the moment.

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Small Wins That Felt Like Big Ones

Amidst the chaos, there were moments of quiet magic. A learner who had remained silent for weeks suddenly answered in full sentences. A creative storytelling task, initially met with resistance, ended in laughter and improvisation. A simple anchor chart became a reference point learners returned to throughout the term.

These small victories mattered. Not because they were spectacular, but because they were emotionally authentic and pedagogically grounded. They signalled an emergent agency (Mercer, 2011). They reminded me that learning is not always linear. It accumulates in bursts and patterns. Over time, I learned to reframe “success” through the lens of proximal development (Vygotsky, 1978). I began to celebrate progress rather than perfection.

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What Helped Me Survive and Start Thriving

Reflective journaling became my pedagogical compass. Writing after lessons helped me externalise thoughts, trace patterns in classroom dynamics, and make sense of emotional undercurrents. This metacognitive habit transformed my reactive responses into intentional adjustments (Farrell, 2015).

Equally vital was the informal support network of colleagues. Conversations in the staffroom, those brief exchanges of insight, validation, or shared frustration, became micro-professional development. I began to appreciate communities of practice (Wenger, 1999) as a model not only for learners but for teachers as well.

Another turning point came when I stopped aiming to be flawless. I started aiming to be responsive. I embraced pedagogical humility. This is the idea that effective teaching grows from a willingness to adapt, question, and revise assumptions (Brookfield, 2017).

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Looking Ahead: Carrying the Learning Forward

What I hope to preserve is a mindset of inquiry. I want to continue teaching with an eye on evidence. At the same time, I want a heart attuned to the lived experience of learners. I also aim to deepen my understanding of developmentally appropriate practice, particularly in multilingual and mixed-ability classrooms.

Ultimately, this first year taught me that teaching is not merely a profession. It is a form of intellectual craftsmanship. The classroom is both a site of action and reflection. In walking that line, I feel more EngSighted than ever.

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References

1. Brookfield, S. D. (2017). Becoming a critically reflective teacher. John Wiley & Sons.
2. Farrell, T. S. (2015). Reflective language teaching: From research to practice. Bloomsbury Publishing.
3. Hargreaves, A. (1998). The emotional practice of teaching. Teaching and teacher education, 14(8), 835-854.
4. Kounin, J. (1977). Discipline and group management. Nova Iorque: RE Krieger Publishing.
5. Mercer, S. (2011). The self as a complex dynamic system. Studies in Second Language Learning and Teaching, 1(1), 57-82.
6. Pianta, R. C., La Paro, K. M., & Hamre, B. K. (2008). Classroom assessment scoring system™: Manual K-3. Paul H. Brookes Publishing Co.
7. Schön, D. A. (2017). The reflective practitioner: How professionals think in action. Routledge.
8. Sweller, J. (1988). Cognitive load during problem solving: Effects on learning. Cognitive science, 12(2), 257-285.
9. Vygotsky, L. S., & Cole, M. (1978). Mind in society: Development of higher psychological processes. Harvard University Press.
10. Wenger, E. (1999). Communities of practice: Learning, meaning, and identity. Cambridge University Press.